Odd things have been springing to mind, unbidden, the past few days. I’m pretty sure I know the reason; I’ve been feeling queer in general ever since I got the news. I’ve been really tired, I want to sleep in and go to bed early. I’ve been more on edge emotionally, as well as feeling pretty reclusive. I’ve also felt drained, creatively speaking. I know it will return. Right now I’m more down with cooking meals and cleaning my house and snugging my cats than writing stuff. It’s OK.

But yeah, things springing to mind. I remembered today this weird dream I had while living in Turkey. One afternoon, I’d dozed off doing my Turkish homework, and I dreamed I was at home. My dad was making pizza. When I was a kid, Saturday nights were pizza nights at my house. My dad home-made his own dough, sauce (my job was to find the Bay leaf and pick it out), and it was awesome. We’d watch PBS while he made food, cooking shows and then This Old House. Honestly, to this day, I cannot hear the This Old House theme song without smelling pizza (paging Dr. Pavlov!). In my dream, we were all assembled, John was there, the show was on. When the buzzer went off, I woke up, frightened and disoriented. It was such a real dream, I was shocked to find myself elsewhere.

I don’t know why I remembered this today, but I did.