Paper Fruit

I had a great Christmas with the family! We did the big dinner and presents on Christmas Eve (I got a Tofu Xpress!!), then a low-key Christmas Day with just my mom and John. I made cinnamon rolls and Gardein sausage for breakfast and then we took a few walks in the nice weather, relaxed, and gobbled up leftovers for dinner which was fine by me. I’m exhausted after a week of partying with John’s family (not one, but two pallet-based bonfires in the back yard!), a trip to Busch Gardens for their Christmas Extravaganza, and everything else. Also, John got me the Blu-Ray of Re-Animator which I’m too excited about. Deleted scenes! Jeffrey Combs’ winsome faun-like face in high definition!

But! Christmas was also awesome for other reasons: A Pretty Mouth now has a brand-new Kindle edition that’s for sale on Amazon for the low, low price of $6.95. I’m really excited, as folks have been asking and asking about an ebook, and now there is one for purchase! Indeed, several friends were kind enough to let me know they bought it last night, so a big thank-you to those people. You know who you are!

AND … omg so yeah, just look at this:

HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS. Just behold the awesome that is “Herbert West in Love,” (the illustration) by Miko. Apparently my Blu-Ray was some sort of trumpeting angel of amazing Re-Animator stuff. Re-Animatormas. I couldn’t be happier—indeed, as I had no idea my story would be illustrated, I am doubly happy. The skull in the lamplight! The crotch bulge! The lace-up club shirt! Oh, Herbert.

Oh, and duh, I should mention that this illustration means “Herbert West in Love” is now available for your reading pleasure over at The Lovecraft eZine. People seem to be enjoying it so far, which is exciting! Thanks to Mike Davis for selecting it for the 20th issue. You can read it for free, which rules! And/or you could wait for the Kindle/Nook edition in a few days and support the eZine which would be awesome of you, as just look at the work they’re doing. It’s awesome. I also hear there will be a podcast edition of the eZine, including “Herbert,” which I plan on downloading and listening to on the plane when I fly back to Colorado. This marks my very first audio edition of anything I’ve published, which is … anyways, yeah, I’m a little emotional. I love this story—it’s about Herbert West kissing boys, of course it’s a favored child—so the fact it’s receiving the deluxe treatment is pretty goddamn awesome.

SO! Merry fucking Christmas to me, me me me me me. But so as not to be totally selfish, here’s something for you, dear readers: A Re-Animatormas cocktail. Top shelf shit, this. Sweet, herbal, nutty, citrusy, and boozy enough to lower your inhibitions when it comes to reaching out and inappropriately touching that special dead someone . It’s a Christmas miracle!

Revivification

2 oz Armagnac
1 oz Green Chartreuse
1 tsp Disaronno

Pour all ingredients into a mixing pitcher. Stir vigorously with lots of ice until cold, then strain into a small snifter. Float a lemon wheel on top. Inhale. Sip.

Starfest/DigiFest/HorrorFest/etc is this weekend! If you’re going to be there, say hi. Here’s where I’ll be:

Friday, 6PM: Asian Cult Cinema Panel

Saturday, 3:30: Writing the Dark Side

Sunday, 12 noon: Multimedia Reading w/Jesse Bullington. We two are collaborating for ours as we’ll be reading our co-authored story “Tubby McMungus, Fat From Fungus.” If you’re looking for it in the program, David Boop, Mike Hance, and Quincy Allen will also be reading.

But! Here’s what you really came here for today: Tahini Blondies!

So I wanted halva but I couldn’t be bothered to buy a candy thermometer. Thus: Tahini Blondies. Adapted from Vegan Cookies Take Over Your Cookie Jar, these are amazing tahini-ful squares of sesame bliss. Not for tahini-haters. If you’re on the fence, try ‘em—they just might change your world. Or at least your ambivalence about tahini.

Tahini Blondies

3/4 cup tahini (I used Joya)

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1 cup brown sugar

1/4 c. non-dairy milk

2 teaspoons vanilla extract

1  cup all purpose flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

2 tsp sesame seeds (I used a mix of white and black)

Preheat oven to 350 F. Lightly grease an 8×8  baking dish.

In a mixing bowl, use a fork to vigorously mix  together tahini, oil and sugar. Stir in milk and vanilla. Stir in  flour, salt and baking powder. The batter will be very very thick and won’t spread on its own. Transfer to baking pan and press it into place. Sprinkle on the sesame seeds and lightly press them into the top.

Bake for 22-27 minutes, the edges should be just barely brown. The top will appear soft, that’s okay. Remove  from oven and cool completely before slicing. I bolded that because they are super gooey if you don’t. Also, I had to go the whole 27 because of altitude, so check yours at 22.